she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
