I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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