I hope mine doesn't look like that
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
