i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just blew my weed a kiss
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
