Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Randomize
