Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.

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  (519): i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there. http://tfl.nu/mjp7
  Replies (145) Good night (4806) Bad night (1238)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.

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  (401): the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH. http://tfl.nu/dbk1
  Replies (45) Good night (6881) Bad night (867)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.

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  (812): My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too. http://tfl.nu/4mju
  Replies (98) Good night (3848) Bad night (9162)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.

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  (218): Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion. http://tfl.nu/1y37
  Replies (23) Good night (5262) Bad night (1099)
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  (805): View more from California

  That bad?

  (1-805): View more from California

  Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.

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  (805): That bad? (1-805): Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding. http://tfl.nu/ntsx
  Replies (14) Good night (934) Bad night (4708)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.

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  (484): I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet. http://tfl.nu/aaoq
  Replies (1) Good night (1062) Bad night (1682)
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  (818): View more from California

  Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.

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  (818): Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested. http://tfl.nu/vry7
  Replies (15) Good night (4889) Bad night (1203)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.

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  (+61): Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon. http://tfl.nu/pw6n
  Replies (9) Good night (2064) Bad night (651)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...

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  (425): He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by... http://tfl.nu/ardl
  Replies (6) Good night (1822) Bad night (608)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.

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  (303): I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell. http://tfl.nu/angx
  Replies (1) Good night (844) Bad night (327)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on

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  (309): Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on http://tfl.nu/7ltw
  Replies (3) Good night (636) Bad night (345)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea

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  (727): I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea http://tfl.nu/2xog
  Replies (0) Good night (371) Bad night (299)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me

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  (775): She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me http://tfl.nu/h40l
  Replies (5) Good night (670) Bad night (319)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?

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  (251): So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"? http://tfl.nu/3mzm
  Replies (5) Good night (548) Bad night (360)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend

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  (775): He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend http://tfl.nu/drlt
  Replies (4) Good night (52) Bad night (125)

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