You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
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how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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