I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
