Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
