So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
