remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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