Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
