Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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