Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize