im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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