Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
