i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
