Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize