Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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