Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize
