Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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