don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize