I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Randomize