Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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