You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize