I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
