a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.