i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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