My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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