too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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