It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
