There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just found puke in my bra..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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