Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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