So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
