It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
