i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
