make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
