Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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