I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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