Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
