I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
