The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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