we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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