she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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