lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize