have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
