Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
