I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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