Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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