He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never too late to be topless.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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