who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
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I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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